On being rebuilt

You know those days when your head is filled with all sorts of negative nonsensical thoughts, and you know you SHOULD NOT entertain them. However, they find a way to creep back in, or you let them back in. Well today was definitely one of those days.

Because of that, or insert whatever excuse sounds good to you, I was super edgy with My husband. I kept on, keeping on, with my attitude. All the way unto the last chore of the day which was mopping the whole house. 

I got my headphones in, and I'm untouchable.  

I start in the kitchen and I'm all mad and bitter because I find some crumbs on the floor. Mind you, my honey so graciously switches off with me with bathing the kids, as well as helping me sweep...along with a long list of other things he helps me with, but I don't want to list them all because I'll lose all credibility as a wife! 

So I start this really great dialogue in my head about how he doesn't sweep correctly, and oh, he didn't pick up that toy and on and on...pretty terrible! Ungrateful wife that I am, I began talking to The Lord about it and feeling sorry for myself, when the Spirit whispered:

It's not his job to build the home, it's yours.

Que, que??? (Say what) *English translation

So I'm floored and ashamed and automatically feel remorse. Total, "girl, get your life" moment! Why don't I want to submit to my place in the home as homemaker? Why am I constantly making excuses as to why I can't or don't want to do something? Why would I rather do anthing than house WORK?

Could it be my perspective has been off? Could it be He needs to rebuild me in this area? Is He exposing my wicked heart, piece by piece? Yes, yes, and yes. You see, He is the potter, and I am just the clay.  When He sees an area in me that is marred, He has all the skills needed to fix it. This area has needed fixing for a while, but I didn't want to allow Him any work space. 

This may not be the area of struggle for you, nonetheless, He desires to rebuild us all individually. And because He formed each of us and knows us inside and out, His Spirit will bring to light areas that need to be tore down and rebuilt by Him. 

I would love to wake up tomorrow and not struggle in this area any longer, however if I don't, my prayer will be for a new perspective in this area, asking Him to rebuild me, and for forgiveness. 

Who knows, one day I might hear God call me his little Mrs. Clean...let's not get crazy now!  I do want to hear Him, above all else, call me His servant as He says, "Well done good and faithful servant, enter into your rest!"

In Him,

 

Darla

“I have loved you, my people, with an everlasting love.
    With unfailing love I have drawn you to myself.
4 I will rebuild you, my virgin Israel.
    You will again be happy"

Jeremiah 31:3-4 NLT